Blindsided

So I just realized something…

wpid-IMG_20130526_121355_065.jpg

I built this cool “alter” to my bearded dragon in June…over the three bearded irises that I planted with Zensai when I buried him. I wonder if they’ll still grow if I move the pots. This irritates me because irises are my favorite flower and I have never been able to grow them. Ever. Now I’m just standing in my own way.

Zensai would be amused.

***

Since we’re doing updates from other posts, the missing fortune kitty is not missing any longer. When I was sweeping the other day I really dug under a shelf and pulled out a kitten-sized minion. The fortune kitty was in the middle. Apparently Obi thought his minions needed a little bit of luck to get that life-giving lightning bolt.

kittehs

 

***

In other news, I found out – after knowing him for 11 years – that The Boy doesn’t like avocados. That means I have four to eat myself this week. Oh, the hardship. Since I couldn’t find the recipe I saw on Pinterest that inspired the purchase of avocados, I decided to make tuna salad tonight. The Boy was leaving so I had to boil my own eggs.

eggs

 

Obi walked through the kitchen once and saw me at the big white box. He put his head down and moved on.

***

And now, today’s actual story:

Oliver wanted to get up this morning. More importantly, he wanted me to get up. And Obi agreed. They were doing a full scale push of annoying things – bouncing the bathroom door, crying from the toothbrush stand, playing with the blinds, poking me in the nose. At one point I heard my glasses slide of my side table.

Here is where I tell you that I really can’t see without my glasses or contacts. And my glasses are just pink stems and the lenses with no frame. I depend on my fantastic memory to find my glasses in the morning.

So this morning I had to crawl around on my knees to find my missing eyesight. It went a little like this:

Me: Obi, where did you put my glasses?

Oli: FEED ME!

Me: I have to find my glasses.

Oli: FEED ME! I’M DYING!

Me: Oh, come on, where could they have gone?

Oli: FEED ME! SOOOOOOOO HUNGRY!

Me: [Censored because I have a personal policy about cussing online]

The Boy: Are they under the bed?

Me: How should I know? I CAN’T SEE.

The Boy: Right.

Oli: FEED ME!

Obi: I thought we were having breakfast.

Oli: FEEEEED ME!

I did finally find my glasses, an arm length (way further than I can see) under the bed, in a shadow, behind a shoe.

Seriously.

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4 responses to “Blindsided

  1. It’s the 21st century. How is it that no one has invented glasses that beep continually whenever they’re on the floor?

    • Right? Or even just a little LED light that blinks. I can see contrast between light and dark without my glasses. They also need to work out a solution for when you drop a contact while putting it in. At the very least they need to make them less sticky so you only have to look at flat surfaces and not check vertical things they might have stuck to.

  2. That literally made me laugh loud enough to clear the den of three of my five kitties! Tho’ I don’t have glasses I do have this *problem* with pencils, nail files & small embroidery scissors. No matter how I try to teach her, ‘Runs with Scissors’ Dharma has not learned to never run with sharp things in her mouth.
    I’m so happy you found your tiny kitten tho’…they’re cute!

    • That’s a might fine jay you have there.

      Obi also hoards things under the couch. My fingernail clippers never manage to stay on the coffee table. Do you think Obi and Dharma are trying to protect us from these sharp things?

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