My friend, Angie, teaches geology at a couple colleges in New Mexico. I like this job because she works weird hours, like I do, so we IM each other a lot during the day. It’s nice to have someone to talk to. I mean, yes, I’m talking to other people – through my keyboard – all day. But she’s the one I can be privately snarky with.
But that all changes in the summer. She takes her kids – sometimes her husband if he doesn’t have to work – and they wander around the country. We still IM and text all day. But sometimes not. I hate summer.
BUT! They have taken a break from gallivanting for a little bit. So today, Angie was saying how typical it was that when her desk is spotless, Maggie the Cat wants nothing to do with her. When it is “overrun,” that’s where the cat wants to be. I nodded and was about to type in that I totally get it. Though with Kitten Thunder there really is no point where they don’t want to be on the desk.
Then I got the pictures. And I have two points to make:
1. This, by my standards, is hardly overrun. Look at all that surface that you can see!
2. It never occurred to me that geologist would have different work stuff than the rest of us on their desk.
Weights with no paper.
***
In other desk related news, Oliver and Obi’s birthday is July 27. Their wish list has been submitted to The Boy.
Oliver has a bag. This is his new favorite place to lay and a spot for which he has forsaken the post-breakfast snuggle. Once in a while Obi comes in to remind him that Tail knocked the bag off the coffee table, so Tail’s attached kitten should be allowed to lay on the bag. The grey kitten sees the reason in this…but he doesn’t get off the bag.
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This week, we have two new programs on OutTV. First off, there is a little black kitteh wandering around. He looks pretty healthy so he obviously belongs to someone. But he is claiming a lot of territory in the neighborhood.
Yesterday, Black Kitteh had a squirrel up a light post. The squirrel was hanging out about ten feet off the ground, trash talking the kitten. Eventually the kitten gave up and walked away. Except he didn’t give up. He hid around the corner and waited for the squirrel to come down. Unfortunately for him, the squirrel (and I) was not fooled. The squirrel came down the pole and crossed the street to our house. Obi and I watched as Black Kitteh chased the squirrel from one channel of OutTV to the next and the next until they were on the Jeff Channel.
Obi doesn’t go outside but he did not want another kitten in his Out.
The more exciting programming is a sharp-shinned hawk that has moved into the neighborhood. She is very talkative and, though we hardly see her, we hear her cry all the time.
Yesterday, Obi was napping on the back of the couch while I worked. He was enjoying some Smell-O-Vision from the Jeff Channel and he was stretched out very flat. As flat, I thought, as he could get.
Until the hawk swooped down between our house and Jeff’s house and screamed just outside our window. She was so close I could hear her wings. The hair stood on the back of my neck.
Hello, I am The Girl and I am an American Ninja Warrior addict.
Kitten Thunder, though, is not impressed. They face these challenges every day…
***
Good evening and welcome to the latest episode of American Kitten Warrior. I’m Girl Thunder and I’m here with my cohost, Boy Thunder. Tonight we’ll see Stage Thursday of the competition with our two competitors, Oliver Pi and Obi Wan Kittenobi.
First up, Obi takes on the Spider Wall. Look at his form as he chases the spider up this near vertical surface. Clearly his training is paying off tonight – it doesn’t look like he’s struggling at all with this obstacle.
Meanwhile, Oliver is on the cat shelf taking on the Sleeper Challenge. Honestly this is one of the hardest obstacles on the course but seems like it should be really easy. But sleeping through an entire afternoon is harder than it looks.
Back to Obi Wan who has moved on to the Half Wall. He jumps up easily but WHOA! He almost lost his balance there and that is a long way down. I’m sure he’s breathing a sigh of relief. He looks to the crowd to see if anyone noticed his bauble – sorry pal, we were all watching.
Now over to Oliver who is attempting the Full Body Stretcher. Each contestant gets three tries at this obstacle. Form is very important here. A lot of contestants underestimate how important it is the stretch from one group of muscles to the next adjacent group of muscles. If you go in with haphazard stretching, there is NO WAY to continue the stretch through your eyebrows and up into your ears. Oliver is a pro at this one, though, and he handles a stretch that goes all the way from his back toes, through his body and utilizes every muscle in his face. Well done.
Yes, impressive work, there.
Obi has moved on to the Supervision Stage. There are two different approaches to take with this challenge – some competitors go with a direct, in-your-face approach that resembles a full snuggle while others choose a more subtle I’m-just-over-here-napping approach. We’ll see what Obi does here…wow! In a surprise move, Obi Wan has climbed into my lap and is supervising well within my reach. This is not the method I would have expected to see from him tonight.
Both Oliver and Obi have reached the final obstacle, the Kitty Cruncher, at the same time. Will they be able to get through the challenge working in tandem? This. Is. Impressive. Both kittens are eating crunchies at the same time, alternating mouthfuls and chewing in a perfectly synchronized manner. Honestly, it looks like they’ve been doing this their whole lives.
AND THEY ARE THROUGH! Both competitors have made it through tonight’s obstacles and are on to the next round. Tune it tomorrow as we enter Stage Friday of AMERICAN KITTEN WARRIOR!
***
And now, some science. Kitteh style.
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This is my 400th blog post! Thank you for coming along.
I built this cool “alter” to my bearded dragon in June…over the three bearded irises that I planted with Zensai when I buried him. I wonder if they’ll still grow if I move the pots. This irritates me because irises are my favorite flower and I have never been able to grow them. Ever. Now I’m just standing in my own way.
Zensai would be amused.
***
Since we’re doing updates from other posts, the missing fortune kitty is not missing any longer. When I was sweeping the other day I really dug under a shelf and pulled out a kitten-sized minion. The fortune kitty was in the middle. Apparently Obi thought his minions needed a little bit of luck to get that life-giving lightning bolt.
***
In other news, I found out – after knowing him for 11 years – that The Boy doesn’t like avocados. That means I have four to eat myself this week. Oh, the hardship. Since I couldn’t find the recipe I saw on Pinterest that inspired the purchase of avocados, I decided to make tuna salad tonight. The Boy was leaving so I had to boil my own eggs.
Obi walked through the kitchen once and saw me at the big white box. He put his head down and moved on.
***
And now, today’s actual story:
Oliver wanted to get up this morning. More importantly, he wanted me to get up. And Obi agreed. They were doing a full scale push of annoying things – bouncing the bathroom door, crying from the toothbrush stand, playing with the blinds, poking me in the nose. At one point I heard my glasses slide of my side table.
Here is where I tell you that I really can’t see without my glasses or contacts. And my glasses are just pink stems and the lenses with no frame. I depend on my fantastic memory to find my glasses in the morning.
So this morning I had to crawl around on my knees to find my missing eyesight. It went a little like this:
Me: Obi, where did you put my glasses?
Oli: FEED ME!
Me: I have to find my glasses.
Oli: FEED ME! I’M DYING!
Me: Oh, come on, where could they have gone?
Oli: FEED ME! SOOOOOOOO HUNGRY!
Me: [Censored because I have a personal policy about cussing online]
The Boy: Are they under the bed?
Me: How should I know? I CAN’T SEE.
The Boy: Right.
Oli: FEED ME!
Obi: I thought we were having breakfast.
Oli: FEEEEED ME!
I did finally find my glasses, an arm length (way further than I can see) under the bed, in a shadow, behind a shoe.
When we moved in to this house, The Boy’s table ended up in the dining room but it only had two chairs. The table in our breakfast nook, which is pine colored, has four chairs. Those chairs keep ending up in the dining room, screaming LOOK AT US NOT MATCHING IN THE ELEGANT DINING ROOM. And the yell that because they are also country.
So we’ve been thinking about chairs.
For almost three years.
This afternoon I was downtown for a meeting and had to walk by Carnival Antiques. She had chairs. On the sidewalk. That were the perfect price if not the perfect color. I have plenty of stain left from the shelves if I decide that they aren’t close enough to the right color.
I brought the chairs home and got the first one exactly four feet inside the door. Before this happened:
Eventually I made Oliver get off the chair so I could move it. Now it is afternoon nap time. Kitten Thunder usually goes upstairs to sleep on the cat shelf.
This is why there aren’t more pictures in this blog.
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When I’m not on here writing about my cats, I own a social media company. That’s right, when I’m not on the interwebs talking about the kittehs I’m on the interwebs talking about other things. And on rare, fantastic, occasions I get to get off the interwebs and teach others about it.
Last Friday I was given the opportunity to talk to people in the mental health industry about advocacy through social media. It was interesting to research and a lot of fun during the session – these folks asked great questions and had me hopping for the full time. At the end of the day, one of the attendees – a peer support specialist – went home and started a blog.
That’s so much more satisfying than the generous check I received for my time (but I’m not giving it back). So check out this up and coming blogger – she’s doing great AND she is incorporating cats!
Kitten Thunder has done in our living room rug. It has stains from everything that ails them and discolored spots where the stains were removed. A decision was made: it had to go.
The process of picking a new rug was complicated and involved many stores. And then, when I found a rug I liked…I found four that I liked. After about ten minutes I narrowed it down to two. After five more minutes of struggle, I called in the focus group – I texted family and friends and asked them to vote. And even though I asked an odd number of people I ended up with a tie.
The Boy was riding back from training in Denver so I was able to get him to cast a tie breaking vote.
And I immediately second guessed the decision. When I walked back to the rugs, the selected one seemed like it would clash with our sage green sofas. But, since I actually asked The Boy for his opinion, I bought the rug to at least put up against the couch to be sure. I was fairly certain I’d be driving back to get the other one.
I set the rolled up rug against the couch. “Does this blue clash with the green, Obi?”
“Who cares,” his look said. “Does it go with brown fur?”
I unrolled the rug.
Verdict: the rug does clash with the couch in certain light. In other light it looks great. Also, Obi doesn’t want his belly rubbed on it.
Maybe, he says, its not too late for the old one.
***
It’s Thunder Thursday! We haven’t had a lot of guest pictures to post lately, but there is a new member in our extended family. Cousins Spade and Gracie have a new brother.
Meet Jigger! He is a little bit smaller than Spade. So far everyone seems to be getting along fine.
Friend Bev gave me some catnip from her yard to plant in our yard. It’s strong stuff. I decided that it would be worth it, after checking the batteries in the camera, to bring in the pot for Kitten Thunder. Once again, brothers were torn apart by their nip habit.
The video is eight minutes long. That’s as long as I could stand to have it in the house because it was making my eyes water. And it was as much as Kitten Thunder could take. When I came back in from putting the plant in the yard, both kitties were passed out on the rug.
I apologize for the length and music-less quality of this video; my editing software wasn’t working with me today so I’m giving you raw footage. Think of it as the director’s cut.
Ta daaaaa! Kitchen floor, counters and sink, complete. The water tasted a little bit like rubber hose for a few days but now we’re good. We are now working on convincing the kittehs that white counter rules still apply to brown counters.
And, now that Obi has been under the sink he wants to be under there all the time. It is almost like he hadn’t made the connection between the bathroom sink with cupboards and the kitchen sink with cupboards.
Long story short, we have to install baby locks on the kitchen cupboards.
***
I was kitteh sitting for Mona’s cats, the handsome Gabe and the beautiful princesses, Gus and Jenny, one night this week. After they’d eaten, I was washing off their plates and saw one of the girls sitting on the landing of the stairway.
“Are you done with your dinner, pretty girl?” I asked. “Last call.”
She said nothing so I rinsed the last plate and babbled to her as I put it in the dishwasher and straightened the kitchen. She said nothing back. She just sat there. Then, as I was headed down the stairs to scritch Gabe’s ears one last time before leaving, I realized I wasn’t talking to a cat at all.
Kitten Thunder: Life lessons and cat tales 