The Cheese Test

I bought cheese at the grocery store on Sunday. A lot of cheese.

I figured The Boy had to be almost out of Swiss cheese for his sandwiches. On a whim, I got some provolone for me. And I got two packages of grated mozzarella for Monday’s pizza. Unfortunately, when I got home I realized we still had cheese. Lots of cheese.

But it gave us an opportunity to test out Obi’s opinion on a new cheese. 

I thought the mozzarella might have a chance because it was grated. So when Obi came begging – “please, Girl, I need the cheese! I love cheese! CHEESE ME!” – I grabbed a pinch from the bag and put it on his plate. He sniffed it. He glared at me. He sniffed it.

And the brown kitten stomped off in a huff.

He sent Oliver in to give me a second opinon. Sniff. Curious look. Sniff.

Nope. Not cheese.

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Cheesy Propositions

I made a grilled cheese sandwich for dinner.

First, an aside: it is really hard to make a grilled cheese sandwich with wheat bread because it doesn’t turn a golden, delicious looking color when it is ready. It just stays brown.

Anywho, Obi was all about helping make a grilled cheese sandwich. I started out with some Muenster cheese, which is what I put on a cold sandwich. I broke off a piece for Obers.

He sniffed it.

He glared at me. This is not cheese.

I grabbed the Gorgonzola cheese crumbles and sprinkled some on my sandwich. Then I gave one to the brown kitten.

Sniff.

Glare. This is not cheese.

To encase the crumbles, I added a piece of Swiss cheese to my sandwich. Then I set down a piece for Obi the Wan.

Sniff. Glare. Not cheese.

Because I didn’t want him to be disappointed, I added a little of our grated cheese – a mix of orange and white – to my sandwich and set some down for Obi. 

At last, some cheese.

The Boy came home from work and also decided to make a sandwich. He discovered that Bleu cheese and feta are also not acceptable.

To summarize: expensive crumbled cheese? Not cheese. Expensive cheese slices? Not cheese. Generic shredded mystery cheese? Yes, please.

State of the Kitten Address

Ladies and gentlemen, it is my pleasure to introduce and welcome the Chief Executive Kitten, Oliver Pi:

My fellow kittehs and kitteh lovers, we come together tonight to discuss the issues that face us as a fur-covered nation.

For too long, the hardest working of us kittehs have gone without tuna. We must work together to ensure that all kittehs, big and small, long haired and short haired, indoor…outdoor…tame and feral, get their fair share of tuna. There is no reason that a kitteh who puts in a full two hour work day should go without tuna.

If you give a man a fish, he might share it today. If you teach a man to fish, he will share for a lifetime.

Or get his fingers bit if he tries to keep it to himself.

There are fuzzies among us who think that cheese, CHEESE, is better than tuna. Now, we obviously don’t always agree. But I say to you that differing opinions is no reason to stop working together. My brother on the other side of the aisle still works with me each day to get The Girl out of bed. Together, we get her to the kitchen. What we choose to do with her presence is up to us.

Over the past few years, our inventory of toys has grown stronger. We have fuzzies (pause for applause), we have mousies (pause for applause),  and we have feather sticks (pause for applause). But we could do better. I am urging each and every one of you to contact my person and tell her that YOU want her to switch from soy back to regular milk. Together, we can bring the milk ring back to this household. 

And tonight I am taking on a new challenge. Tonight, I will monopolize the entire loveseat. Not just the side with a fuzzy blanky. Not just the side with the pillows. Both sides. I am up to this challenge. I encourage you to find a challenge of your own and conquer it.

Thank you. Good night. And may dogs leave America.

And now, the brown kitten response from Obi Wan Kittenobi:

Did someone say cheese?

A weekend with Obi

“There’s a dog on this book. I thought it was a present. Who would want a dog?”

On Saturday, we had a party to go to for a little boy. It turned out I had a headache and the idea of going to the Party Pony with a bunch of happy, screaming five year olds was intolerable. But I didn’t know that when Obi and I wrapped the present.

“This is MY box. Be gone!”

This morning, Obi and I were downstairs working out. He found an empty box balanced on another box. There was much cuteness. Then the box tipped and he struggled to find some way to lay comfortably.

Eventually, I stepped in and leveled the box. All was well with the world.

“If you’re going to stay, would you at least go get us some cheese?”

And then we did a little Photoshop.

Say Cheeeeeeeese Treats!

Confession: The Boy and I have been on vacation for the last week. I bought some cheese flavored treats for kitteh (and dragon!) sitter Lori to bribe Obi with.

But Obi decided he does not need Lori’s help.

We’ve decided to stop leaving bags of treats on the coffee table.

Pointing fingers

I’d like to point out that I am at home with the kittens all day. I rub their bellies. I share my lunch. I hold them in my lap and let them watch the typey light box thing. Oh, and I – only I – scoop their litter boxes.

That said, The Boy was in the kitchen tonight making a grilled cheese sandwich. He’d gotten out the sliced Swiss cheese and put it on the bread. The crinkle of the Swiss cheese package brought a brown kitten running into the room. I, me, The Girl, got the shredded cheese out of the refrigerator.

I told Obi that I would give him some cheese. After all, I said, I was his favorite.

Obi yowled. Making eye contact with me, he raised a paw and pointed to The Boy. I kid you not.  That little brat actually contradicted me and said that The Boy was his favorite.

He got the cheese anyway.

The Boy, trying to mend bridges, told me I was most definitely Obi’s favorite girl in the whole house.

What. Ev.

Sunday Snapshots and Schneezels

Today was not supposed too be another Pajama Day. But shortly after The Boy coaxed me onto the main floor with the promise of steak and eggs, I was joined on the couch by Kitten Thunder. How can I make my two fuzzies get up just because I am still in my jammies?

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Speaking of jammies, I got green pajamas with kittehs on them for Christmas. They are very soft. They are a big reason why I’m being held down by Kitten Thunder. They love the soft jammies!

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Oliver is very sneezey this week. Any disturbance makes him sneeze. Rolling over. Getting up. Walking across the room. Eating. Drinking. The Boy and I are tired of being sneezed on. We are tired of the schneezels.

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When given the choice between a pepperoni or a pinch of shredded cheese, Obi will always pick the cheese. Brown kitten loves him some cheese.

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The Christmas tree is naked and waiting for The Boy to put it away. Obi will miss it. He still plays with it every day. I will not miss scooping Christmas tree out of the litter box.

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We haven’t touched the jigsaw puzzle since The Boy’s mom left. We’ve been busy. If we don’t finish it soon there will be no more pieces. Somebody keeps taking the pieces and hiding them under the rug.

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That’s all for Snapshot Sunday. Happy birthday to my grandma, Kitten Thunder’s “More Grandperson!”