Tag Archives: FML

Blindsided

So I just realized something…

wpid-IMG_20130526_121355_065.jpg

I built this cool “alter” to my bearded dragon in June…over the three bearded irises that I planted with Zensai when I buried him. I wonder if they’ll still grow if I move the pots. This irritates me because irises are my favorite flower and I have never been able to grow them. Ever. Now I’m just standing in my own way.

Zensai would be amused.

***

Since we’re doing updates from other posts, the missing fortune kitty is not missing any longer. When I was sweeping the other day I really dug under a shelf and pulled out a kitten-sized minion. The fortune kitty was in the middle. Apparently Obi thought his minions needed a little bit of luck to get that life-giving lightning bolt.

kittehs

 

***

In other news, I found out – after knowing him for 11 years – that The Boy doesn’t like avocados. That means I have four to eat myself this week. Oh, the hardship. Since I couldn’t find the recipe I saw on Pinterest that inspired the purchase of avocados, I decided to make tuna salad tonight. The Boy was leaving so I had to boil my own eggs.

eggs

 

Obi walked through the kitchen once and saw me at the big white box. He put his head down and moved on.

***

And now, today’s actual story:

Oliver wanted to get up this morning. More importantly, he wanted me to get up. And Obi agreed. They were doing a full scale push of annoying things – bouncing the bathroom door, crying from the toothbrush stand, playing with the blinds, poking me in the nose. At one point I heard my glasses slide of my side table.

Here is where I tell you that I really can’t see without my glasses or contacts. And my glasses are just pink stems and the lenses with no frame. I depend on my fantastic memory to find my glasses in the morning.

So this morning I had to crawl around on my knees to find my missing eyesight. It went a little like this:

Me: Obi, where did you put my glasses?

Oli: FEED ME!

Me: I have to find my glasses.

Oli: FEED ME! I’M DYING!

Me: Oh, come on, where could they have gone?

Oli: FEED ME! SOOOOOOOO HUNGRY!

Me: [Censored because I have a personal policy about cussing online]

The Boy: Are they under the bed?

Me: How should I know? I CAN’T SEE.

The Boy: Right.

Oli: FEED ME!

Obi: I thought we were having breakfast.

Oli: FEEEEED ME!

I did finally find my glasses, an arm length (way further than I can see) under the bed, in a shadow, behind a shoe.

Seriously.

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