Tag Archives: humor

THE BEASTY

Hello, peoples of the world, Obi here.

AND JACK. I’M HERE TO TELL YOU ABOUT THE BEASTY!

Yes, we’re going to tell you about the excitement we had the other night.

IT WAS A BEASTY!

Yes. Anywho.  It was getting close to sunset. The Girl was putting Buddy to bed (Okay was already in her room and asleep). The Boy was waiting in the next room in case she needed backup.

BUT WE NEEDED BACKUP BECAUSE I SAW THE BEASTY!

Yes. Having been relieved of our supervisory duties in the children’s rooms, I assigned Jack to patrol at the open windows and doors. I was going to take the next shift, after a little nap.

AND I SAW THE BEASTY!

Yes. I had just closed my eyes for a couple minutes and I heard Jack call out.

I SAW THE BEASTY!

Yes. I joined Jack at the patio door and called The Boy for reinforcements. Of course Jack and I could have handled it ourselves – except we’re not allowed outside.

AND IT WAS A HORRIBLE BEASTY!

Yes. The Boy came to see what we were yelling about.  He looked outside but he didn’t see.

IT WAS THE BEASTY!

Yes. He assured us there was nothing wrong.

BUT IT WAS THE BEASTY!

Yes. He said he would check it out. The Boy bravely went outside. To show he wasn’t afraid of any man or beast, he wielded the water hose and casually got things wet in several parts of the yard. Jack and I remained at the door, prepared to protect him if needed.

HE CONQUERED THE BEASTY!

Yes. There was no sign of danger by the time he came back indoors. Hey, Jack, what exactly did the beasty look like?

IT WAS COVERED IN FUR WITH A HUGE FLUFFY TAIL. THEY HANG UPSIDE DOWN TO STEAL FOOD IN THE CAFE. THE BEASTLIEST OF BEASTLY BEASTIES! AND IT WAS ALMOST NIGHT!

Ye- wait. It was a squirrel?

A BEASTY!

Hmm. Well, that’s embarrassing. Maybe I should have gotten more detail before we sounded the alarm.

THE BOY BEAT THE BEASTY! HE DIDN’T COME BACK UNTIL THE NEXT MORNING!

Yeah…let’s not tell The Boy about this. Promise not to tell, peoples of the internet?

Until next time,
Obi AND JACK, me-out!

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

After setting up the tree this year, I asked my friends on Facebook to place their bets.

The bets were all about how long Squeak would allow the tree to stand. How long the ornaments would stay on. Whether he would climb it. But the only thing Squeak has done is turn the lights on (and off and on and off and on and off and on and off and on and off and on and off and on and off and on and off and…).

People forgot all about Kitten Thunder. And that this tree is for Obi.

Oliver was content to watch. And duck the halls, courtesy of a friendly toddler.

Eventually, even the tree was tired and we all took a nap.

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Mirror Mirror

Mirror mirror in baby’s hands,

Upon the wall throws lighted bands.

The cat will chase them to and fro,

Though you’ve no idea where they will go.

Super Vising

Hello peoples of the internets! Obi here.

Sometimes I feel like The Boy sold me a bill of goods with Squeak. He still doesn’t Thunder with me like they said he would.

He doesn’t even know how to play with the cool toys The Girl bought for us.

But he looks to me for advice. And he is getting better.

And he’s good for snuggling… He doesn’t think he needs to hug or kiss me like The Girl does.

And at  I don’t have to do his laundry because Oliver volunteered. And The Boy finished it when my brother was done.

Test Drive

The Boy and I continue to do interesting things to entertain Kitten Thunder.

Yesterday, I was sewing. With equal parts help and supervision, of course.

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Then The Boy showed up in the living room and started messing with Obi’s tall box. This box has been in the living room for a couple weeks. Obi didn’t know it opened!

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For a minute, Obi wasn’t sure he liked what was happening.

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He thought maybe we should go back to sewing.

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But his sense of duty won out and he returned to Boy supervision.

We were quickly done with putting the pieces of the box together. It was followed by a lot of “where is the button that does this” and “how does that go in” from both people.

Obi, however, figured it out right away.

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And today, Oliver discovered it’s a double decker.

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Just don’t try to take either of them for a stroll.

Fabric Inspection

After dinner, there were no kittens holding me down. This led to and unexpected burst of productivity.

The Boy and I went into the baby’s room so that, as pregnant women are supposed to do, I could have him move furniture from one perfectly good location to a new location across the room.

And of course Kitten Thunder showed up to help.

There are no pictures of the ridiculous amount of under footedness that was happening because I was shouting orders for kittens to get out of the way.

After the furniture was in the right place, for now, the room looked startlingly like a person could live there in two months.

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Kitten Thunder found letters on their bed to inspect.

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And fabric.

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They approve.

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Test Drive

We might not know anything about tiny baby humans, but in this house we are well versed in large cats.

And they owe us.

So when my baby sling came in the mail, The Boy and I decided Oliver would help us try it out.

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This is how he likes me to hold him, at arm’s length, so he actually really enjoyed it. Especially since I’d normally put him down when I needed to scratch my nose but I didn’t have to.

I may have gotten a size too small to hold a baby, but for a kitten… It’s purrfect.