Conundrum

When I last posted, we were wondering what poor Obi would do about belly rubs now that the quilt is off the floor. At lunch time he had tried to talk The Boy into going into the fort with him.

That didn’t happen.

So what did the brown kitten do for his after work belly rub? Did he…

A) Do a belly flop onto the fort to collapse the whole thing?

B) Decide to get his belly rub on the quilt, now wadded up in a pile on the couch?

C) Decide that a piece of brown packing paper on the other side of the room was the proper place for belly rubbing.

D) Try really hard to find belly rubs on the basement carpet satisfying.

The answer is…E) all of the above.

Tuesday was a horrible night for Obi as he tried desperately to get a decent belly rub. None of these options worked for him. Two days later there is still no solution.

To make matters worse, he REALLY likes the fort. He plays in it all day.

Life is so hard for an abused brown kitten.

I suggested, while The Boy and Obi were trying to complete a morning belly rub today, that maybe he should just get his belly rubbed right there on the rug where it used to happen. Obi glared at me and walked away.

The Boy pointed out that Obi has never liked this rug. It was the old rug that was the belly rubbing rug.

Oh.

Poor abused brown kitten. The Boy giveth and The Girl taketh away.

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Interested

The Boy has a dresser that had moved around with him since he was a child. It was, possibly, his dad’s before that. As a child he chose to have it painted bright red.

I didn’t want it to be red anymore.

I’ve been painting the dresser a little at a time for a couple weeks. Out in the garage. As you know, Kitten Thunder did not approve.

I’m not quite done painting but the snow storm inspired me to close up painting operations in the garage so my car could sleep inside. With a 7 a.m. meeting, I was not interested in risking an inch of ice on the windshield.

So the bench that I bought lady week came in. Oliver stood in the way and I had to yell at him to move.

He was interested.

Then I brought in the dresser and tried to put the drawers in. Oliver wanted to supervise from inside.

He was interested.

Then I wanted to take a picture with him with the finished dresser and bench. I set him on the bench. Nope. The dresser? Nope.

He wasn’t interested.

***
I did manage to get photos of Oliver on the bench by Obi’s favorite OutTV Channel.

Obi sharing the channel with his brother? Not interested.

***
In case you’re interested, the handles of the dresser are faucet handles. There are two more for the top drawer. And I think we’ll get the more so we can put one in the middle – they look a little awkward to me with only two. We just need to find a store with a different design.

Teach Me, Obi Wan

Every time I make the bed in my office, it gets unmade. A brown kitten burrows and shoves and digs until the sheets are piled in the middle. It is mostly annoying.

But this? This is impressive.

Obi wrapped himself up in the blankets; this is what we called a burrito baby when I was a kid.

Oh, wise Obi Wan Kittenobi, tell me the ways of The Force…

Nothing But, Lizard Butt

Hey, Zensai, what are you doing in there?

Nothing. Leave me alone.

Paper Playland

I thought  the blog tonight would be about wrapping presents. I had a “how to” planned with the joys of kitten interference.  Clever observations about hairy tape were planned. But, as always, Kitten Thunder refuses to perform according to MY script. Oliver and Obi dutifully accompanied me to the basement for wrapping. But after sniffing the tape and finding out I wouldn’t let them run the scissors, they decided Paper Playland was way more fun.

Sorry, I know it is Thunder Thursday but it is also very late because I’ve been fighting with my new computer and I want to go to bed. And it’s my blog, so I’m gonna.

A letter from Kitten Thunder

Dear grandpeople,

We have come to realize, after watching The Girl and The Boy steadily clean the house, that you are coming to visit. While we’re happy to have you here, please excuse the people from any more cleaning. We do not like it.

The Girl has been putting away the clothing that makes our comfy downstairs napping spot on what she calls “the spare room bed.” We find her justification – that you’ll need someplace to sleep – to be suspect. We have at least twenty other places in the house that you can sleep. Have you ever considered the window sill in the reading nook? The sunbeam on the floor in the kitchen?

The Boy’s actions are even worse. All summer we’ve been pushing out extra fur and forming it into clumps which we’ve stored in the corners, along walls and on the staircase. We were so close. Just one bolt of life-giving lightning and we would have had a complete set of minions. Obi is ready to move into management. How are we supposed to move him up without minions? Sometimes people just don’t think.

And now, a word about breakfast. We don’t like to complain, but The Girl doesn’t feed us. And worse, she’s done a good job of convincing The Boy that she does. So while you are here, please feel free to open as many cans of cat food as you’d like. When she does feed us, The Girl gives us two cans each.

And one in the afternoon.

And some tuna at midnight.

Please don’t feel like you need to tell The Girl when you have fed us. She’s accustomed to us fending for ourselves.

Sincerely,
Your grandkittens,
Kitten Thunder

***

Thunder Thursday! This is my friend Jacob’s new kitten, Duc.

"I'm cute, therefore I am."

Before You Meet Kitten Thunder at BlogHer…

The whole social world is abuzz with talk of the BlogHer Conference which begins on Thursday. People are talking about what they are wearing and what newbies should know and what weird eccentricities others should expect. But, as much as it pains me, we are not going to BlogHer. And this is why:

1. Oliver and Obi are BOYS. It is not BlogHim.

2. Oliver and Obi are CATS.

3. As much as you folks seem to like it – “kitten nudists” is the number one search term for bringing readers to this blog – conferences look down on attendees parading around naked. I can’t even get Oliver to wear a necklace so clothes are probably out of the question.

4. Driving the six blocks to the airport with Oliver screaming his fool head off would fray my nerves. Flying with him all the way to San Diego would not only irritate my nerves to raw but would probably inspire the pilot to find a nice mountain to run into or a lake or something, anything, to stop the yowling.

5. Obi is too cute. Hundreds of girls oohing and aahing would be too much to bear. Not to mention he’d have to be held.

6. Obi sees no reason to open the blog to professional business practices. We have plenty of tuna, so clearly things are fine. Oliver says we could have more tuna, but couldn’t I just figure this all out with the box of light and the clicky board?

7. Twenty five pounds of fuzzy doesn’t fit comfortably in the carry on suitcase.

8. Four days is an awfully long time to go without a proper belly rubbing. We’d have to take The Boy with us. He has another trip planned.

9. Have I mentioned this tiny life issue involving two houses, a car, several roofs and checks spread all over the country with various denominations and ETAs? Crazy and crabby is NOT the first impression I’d like to give to the greater blogging world.

Next year, BlogHer, I will be there.

Kitten Thunder will stay home. Nude.

Sunday Snapshots: CFD Edition

Cheyenne Frontier Days is over. This makes me both happy and sad. Same goes, I imagine, for pretty much every resident of Cheyenne. Except for those that just hate it and leave town for ten days.

If you were to ask Oliver what his favorite part of CFD was, he would say Monday, Wednesday and Friday. The Boy has to work at the free pancake breakfast downtown so he was getting up at 4:30 a.m. Oliver is more than happy to eat breakfast that early. Obi wasn’t sure at first but he ate anyway in defense of his portions.

If you ask Oli was his least favorite part was, he would probably say it was getting in trouble on Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday and Sunday for trying to get me out of bed for breakfast at 4:30 a.m.

Obi’s favorite part of the week was the excellent programming on OutTV. Much like sweeps week, we had a wide variety of guest stars including drunk cussing guy, the WOO girls, horses, and the new bird feeder he got for his birthday.

Obi’s least favorite part was how much we were gone. His belly was seriously under rubbed. Between the personal errands and visitor schmoozing I had to do for work I don’t think I made it home for many lunches. Honestly, I don’t remember; it is a long week.

***

I was out in the garage today going through some boxes and I found this picture. This is Poco and I on her first night at our house.

Kids and kittens are so cute at that age...

Nothing to say about it really, just got a kick out of it.

OutTV: Lonesome Dove

This evening, while The Boy was cooking our dinner, Obi and I were watching OutTV. In the alley by our house there were about 30 sparrows. They were all taking a dust bath. I guess the Thunder Cafe is now part of a spa/resort.

As we watched, a dove strolled from where he was picking at seed underneath Thunder Cafe. He walked down the alley. Between the sparrows. Once in a while he would stop and look at one of them. Eventually he got through the group and turned to walk, alone, down the sidewalk.

Lonesome dove.

***

My head is kind of a whirlwind right now. The new roof on my old house was destroyed by the hail storm. I had the insurance company come out and they gave me a check which had to be mailed to a special branch of my bank in Ohio so they could sign it over to me. This was two days before my house was supposed to sell. But now it isn’t selling until next Friday so I had time to find a roofer. He starts tomorrow. The check from my first new roof hasn’t even been cashed yet.

Meanwhile, my car was also totaled. So this week I had to go find out if there’s a new car that I don’t hate. Found some options. And so I agreed to the settlement from my insurance – now would be a great time to point out that I was planning to switch to liability only in September so EXCELLENT timing!

And here’s where it gets complicated: I don’t want to buy a new car until my house is sold, to get my check for the car I have to mail them the keys, the people coming to get my car aren’t coming until after next Friday and the paperwork all has the mileage from four days ago and every day I drive I add another ten miles. At some point I’m going to either have two cars (if I use my roof check to buy a car and then my car check to buy a roof) or no car.

Any of these things is complicated enough, without doing them all at the same time. On top of this logistical trickiness, I am now feeling guilt. Irrational guilt about hurting the feelings of my house and my car by getting rid of them. It would make me so sad to have to drive past my beloved Saturn in a new car. It would hurt his feelings, I know it would!

***

And now that I’ve proven myself insane: it is Thunder Thursday! Today we bring you Tommy, the king of crabby. Tommy is my grandparents’ cat and these pictures were taken by my aunt while she was in town in June. And here’s the thing about Crabby Tommy – we, the people he is mean to, are the people who picked him out and gave him to my grandpa for Father’s Day. He was the sweetest kitten ever – he even kissed my uncle’s nose and purred.

Boy, did he have us fooled.

I guess as long as he’s nice to my grandparents, that is all that matters.

"Bags are for the birds. Unless they have birds on them."

"Be sure to get my good side."

"You didn't think you were leaving without me, did you?"

Happy Birthday, Kitten Thunder

Happy birthday to you,
You’re eight; and you’re two
Happy birthday, Kitten Thunder
Happy birthday toooooo yooooooou!

That’s right, Oli and Obi have the same birthday. And it’s tomorrow. I didn’t even plan it that way. In fact, I didn’t notice until I took Obi in for his one-year appointment back in April. But how convenient is that?

I’m not really the type to get all celebratory about my pets’ birthdays. Heck, we barely get celebratory when The Boy or I has a birthday. So Kitten Thunder might get a can of tuna in the middle of the day. That’s about it.

And, since I was in the store and have been planning to get one anyway…

"We'll call this new program on OutTV...Thunder Cafe."

The new bird feeder is a big hit. We’ve had sparrows and wrens galore at an already wonderful window. Two windows, actually, because you can see the feeder from the breakfast nook and the dining room. It also hangs low enough that doves can sit on the fence and eat from it.

It might be low enough for squirrels to sit on the fence and eat from it. Which may be why there is a LOT of birdseed on the ground.

"Thunder Cafe is a big success! In one day, the customers have almost cleaned out the inventory!"

Hopefully the birds take better care of their things than the squirrels do.

"The easiest route is a straight line - right through the lid of the box."

There is a new squirrel in the neighborhood and boy is he ever stupid. He chewed this giant hole in the box in one day. While sitting on it. The bright side is that when the peanut level is low he has to climb all the way into the box. So we get little squirrel legs kicking in the air as he goes in. Very cute. And we get squirrel face peeking out once he gets a nut. Very very cute.

But I still hope we don’t have any stupid sparrows.