Thunder Thursday Snapshots

Oli was on the director’s chair glaring at me because I’m in his chair. Then he got in the condo and glared at me. Then I looked over and he was laying on my computer bag on the bed. Oliver is on his blanket. Poor put down upon brown kitten.

Just as I finished writing that paragraph, Oli and Obi switched places. All is right with the world.

I left the house for two hours today. Kitten Thunder was so relieved when I arrived home. Have I put more products in my Zazzle store? I assured them I have.

Last night I went into the basement to Draino my shower and there was a HUGE wolf spider in there. It made the one in this photo look kind of on the small size. I’ve discovered that I have an inner second grade boy – for about ten seconds I thought about what the spider would do if I poured Draino on it. Luckily, the me that would still feel guilty about that ten years later smacked the 2nd grade boy upside the head.

When the Draino had done its magic, Obi happened to be with me and he chased the spider for a while. Then it ran down the drain. Which means it was waiting for me this morning because it can’t climb the walls of the bathtub. Ick. I scooped him up with a box and threw him in the trash.

So he’s still down there…waiting…

The squirrels are frantically collecting food for the winter because it is finally a tiny bit cooler. I slept under a sheet for the first time in four months last night. Yay! It has made for some excellent OutTV because I stocked all the window sills with corn mix and peanuts.

I put some finch mix in the bird feeder, hoping for some goldfinches. Nope. Sparrows and wrens as per usual. I was hoping some of the Brewers blackbirds would come over for some of the corn. Unfortunately, our neighbor seems to be serving bird cocaine and they won’t budge from that feeder. Eventually they’ll notice the berry trees on the other side of our house and there will be AWESOME OutTV for about one day while they strip them clean.

The squirrels are also harvesting the plums on those top branches of our tree. They make getting the plums look easy. Climbing a telephone pole with a plum in your mouth, however, looks difficult.

Since I’m LOLing at you, this is a cute picture of an otter. The Boy and I are going to Monterey/Redwood City/San Francisco in the near future. My favorite part of the Bay area? Otters. Otters. Otters.

We should probably do a drinking – or the “if I had a dollar for every time I hear” – game about the word otter. Because I’ll be talking about them. A lot.

Interesting fact: otters have to be taught to swim. And the first time they are dragged into the water they act as if their mother is trying to kill them. No joke.

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How to Sew Curtains

Preparation

1. Read email from friend saying she needs help picking out fabric for daughter’s new princess extravaganza room. Gag a little in anticipation of princess pink, but agree to meet her at the fabric store.

2. Realize at the store that you are expected to sew the curtains. Accuse friend of leaving that part out. When she objects, tell her she is smoking pot.

3. Spend time needed to purchase supplies and lunch afterward trying to teach toddler to say, “Mom, you are smoking pot.” Think this is especially funny since, of all your friend who may have smoked the pot, this friend is least likely to have actually done so.

4. Receive sincere thanks for curtain project. Less sincere thanks for teaching children about pot.

5. Return home to find that email does, in fact, clearly ask you to sew curtains.

Set up

1. Lay fabric out on the floor. Remove brown cat.

2. Cut fabric to appropriate length. Remove grey cat.

3. Lay black out fabric on the floor. Take break for breakfast. Remove Mr. Bear.

4. Cut black out fabric to appropriate size. Wrap brown cat in fabric and gitchy gitchy him until he’s over excited and runs from the room.

Sewing

1. Lay two types of fabric together to pin them. Remove brown cat.

2. Change needle on sewing machine. Try to remember when needle broke. Do not succeed in the remembering.

3. Load the bobbin with appropriately colored thread. Look at horrified kittens on the table and realize that neither of them has ever seen a sewing machine.

4. Start sewing two pieces of fabric together. Remove grey cat.

5. Stop and move brown cat to kitty condo after 14 whacks on the nose with the bobby part on the machine.

6. Finish one edge. Decide it’s time to take a break. A long break.

7. Decide to blog about sewing curtains rather than finish the other seven seams.

And…post blog. What was I doing?

For Thunder Thursday, I bring you an LOLcat that actually made me LOL. I was researching costumes for The Boy and I; we’re going to a meme party. I was told that LOLcattiness was expected of me, given this blog. So I’m thinking…ceiling cat and basement cat?

I’m also sharing a picture of a pug loaf. I saw this and giggled like an idiot for at least two minutes. Then I laughed intermittently throughout the evening just from the memory of it.

I’m sorry, I don’t have any way to track the sources of these pictures for attribution. Hat tip to the memeiverse.