Lesson One

Oliver decided it is time for Squeak to learn how to be a good people. It’s important to start training early. I myself had casual training as a child with Tika and Stasha. It began in earnest with Poco.

I’m proud to be able to say I’m tortie trained and kitten approved.

Lesson one is a biggie: how to give good pets. How to scritch. How to rub a kitteh the right way.

Oliver arrived at my side and considered his subject. He watched Squeak’s tiny fist, held out from his body.

And the grey kitten stretched out his face. He ran his chin over the baby fist.

I tried to help. I repositioned Squeak and tried to put his hand on Oliver’s head.

Unfortunately, the lesson didn’t go very far. Kittens aren’t as cool as ceiling fans.

Lesson cancelled. For now.

Hero in the Night

Hello peoples of the internet. This is Obi. I want to tell you how awesome my brother is. He’s a hero!

As you know, our Boy and Girl brought home a people-kitten a few weeks ago. Oliver and I have adjusted to the added responsibility but managing three humans is a lot of work.

Usually Squeak is with either The Boy or The Girl, but sometimes they leave him to sleep in his cage in our room. Then they lock him in by shutting the door. In the daytime, Oliver and I take turns supervising from the box in the hallway. We also supervise from this position when The Girl feeds Squeak at night.

Side note: Oliver and I have had a lot of talks about this and could someone tell him he is NOT a people? He thinks he is because The Girl fed him from a bottle, just like they feed Squeak. But I say maybe Squeak is half cat, because he eats from his mom as well – just like I did with my mom when I was a kitten. Oli doesn’t remember having a mom, other than The Girl, so maybe he’s right. 

But I don’t think so.

Anywho.

When the people are in bed, I supervise on the main floor while Oliver snuggles with The Girl to get her settled in bed. Sometimes I take the whole first shift so he can get some sleep – he’s getting kind of old and he’s been sleeping more since all those doctor appointments last fall.

Sometimes he takes his shift supervising and naps on the steps so he can hear The Girl and Squeak at the same time. That, folks, is a master supervisor.

Last night, we both happened to be supervising. And Squeak started to talk about his middle of the night snack. Then he started to cry.

This is usually when The Girl arrives. She has a tiny box she carries around that lets Squeak talk to her when they aren’t in the same room. Her ears aren’t as good as ours (seriously, people are practically deaf. How do you get by?)

Squeak cried some more

No Girl.

Squeak’s cry went from a call to a panicked howl. 

No Girl.

I asked Oliver what we could do. The door was closed so we couldn’t help our baby. The Girl’s talky box obviously wasn’t working. The fans upstairs were covering up Squeak’s cry (again, people are deaf).

He nodded to me and said “a lifetime if training is about to pay off.” Then he led me upstairs.

He jumped into bed and head-butted The Girl. Then he did it again, hard. She scritched his head and pulled him close for a snuggle without opening her eyes. He didn’t give in for a second. He pushed out of her arms and went in again. First with another head-butt. Then he put his nose on her lips and shoved his face into her mouth like a wedge. 

This move is usually reserved as the final move after hours of trying to wake The Girl for breakfast because it always works but she’s not very happy when she wakes up. Like, really not happy. But this was for our baby and there was no time to lose.

The Girl spluttered awake and glared at Oliver. But we could tell she could almost hear Squeak over the fans. Like lightning her hand flew to the talky box, which was dark and quiet.

“Oh no!” she yelled and leapt, almost cat-like I want to say, out of bed. She barely touched the floor on her way to Squeak.

It took a couple minutes for us all to calm down. I got in my up high supervising spot and Oliver stood by the chair and performed a Cat Scan on the baby while he ate. Other than raised heart rates, he said, both of the peoples were fine.

After a while, Squeak went back to sleep. But I wasn’t going anywhere. Neither was Oli. Neither was The Girl.

She thanked Oliver for his heroic deed with breakfast, then treats, then a snuggle and hundreds of kisses. Which is fine if you like that sort of thing. And he does.

I was happy with breakfast. 

I asked Oliver how he knew to go directly for the face wedge. He looked at me incredulously. “We do the wake up drill every single morning.

“You thought that was about breakfast?”

Well yes, yes did.

Maybe Oliver isn’t such a pudding head after all.

Obi out.

Donations 

Two years ago, I sorted through my clothing and filled two huge Rubbermaid containers with clothes to donate. Then they sat in the basement. And sat. And sat.

Three months ago, I had The Boy carry them upstairs so I could call someone to come pick them up. I figured they wouldn’t question the pick up since I was 43 months pregnant.

And they sat in our entryway.

The issue was that to get a Tuesday pick up you needed call when the place was open. On Thursday. Or Friday. Or Saturday. When did I remember? On Tuesday.

So, in July, The Boy’s mom came to visit. She’s not much of a sit around and watch TV type person so she decided to get rid of the clothes. 

And she had help.

Of course.

Obi thought the clothes made a great sleeping spot.

Oliver agreed.

Budge

Look, kid, we’re going to have to come to an understanding. We notice that there are certain times when you start crying.

Like when The Girl tries to eat. They’ve explained to you that she has to eat in order for you to eat, but that doesn’t seem to be getting through.

Another time is when I get cozy on MY Girl and want to take a nap. Well I’m not going to try to reason with you.

I’m just not budging.

If I have to share, you have to share.

Alone in the Dark

This week has been a big one on the Thunder household. At least to me. Squeak sleeps for three or four hours at a time now. That means I get a decent night’s sleep.

That means it’s worth trying to sleep my bed instead of the bed in Squeak’s room.

Oliver LOVES this. 

Because the kittens are on guard duty. Oliver guards the Girl. Obi guards the baby. If I’m locked in the same room as Squeak, Kitten Thunder has to decide who is guarding from the box in the hall and who will guard from the floor.

If I’m in bed, Oliver can guard me… In the bed.

Also, if I’m going back upstairs I don’t necessarily need to close the door while Squeak is eating. I DO need to count noses before I go upstairs – I can’t tell you how many times the call for me to open the door has sounded through the baby monitor.  
I can tell you Oliver’s voice registers three bars on the volume meter on the monitor. That’s the red zone. The “your baby is serious” zone.

And, as long as I’m leaving the door open, Oliver can trust Obi to guard us both. He needs the extra rest, these days.

And Obi?

He’s got us covered.

***

It’s Squeak’s one-month birthday! The kittehs have decided to stick with Squeak as his name even though they now know he has a wide range of sounds. They considered other names like Oots and Grunt. Others, like “Blood Curdling Scream For No Reason” just don’t have the same ring to them.

Great Reads

Happy Sunday morning to you! I hope you’ve got a good cup of coffee and a quiet, sunny porch like I do. Or some great OutTV like Obi. 

He’s watching Squirrels on Scaffolding.
Since the workers aren’t going to be back until Tuesday, I used their scaffolding to put out some bread at eye level. Rarely does a spin off exceed the quality of the original program, but Obi thinks this show is much better than Legs.

But that’s not the topic today’s blog.

Squeak received two large boxes of books from his cousins’ library last week. At first, Obi was interested.

Then he noticed the box was an excellent platform for checking out the baby.

That was more interesting. Obi has decided the baby is his. He has high expectations for me and wants me to stop all crying immediately. If I can’t, he attempts a Cat Scan. Unfortunately for the brown kitten, getting close enough to sniff a baby forehead also puts you within range of flailing baby arms.

Back to the books, Oliver also checked out the delivery but was uninterested in helping when I asked.

And Squeak? He says he’ll read them later.

OutTV: Legs

There’s special programming on OutTV this week. I thought it should be called Stucco Guys. Oliver says “Legs” says it all.

Unfortunately, we are not getting our money’s worth out of this programming. I mean, sure, there’s new beautiful stucco going up. But as far as entertainment value goes…

Obi gives it one and a half “Meh”s.

Squeak gives no cares at all.

Oliver found it interesting from a technical side – it’s in surround sound and on almost every channel – but since it doesn’t incorporate smell-o-vision, he quickly lost interest.

Besides, the plot is kind of repetitive.